Stuck in the middle?
‘I found it difficult with my mum and dad not speaking to each other. I was sometimes given horrible messages to pass between them. The worst of these were about money. It made me feel really uncomfortable and angry. I wanted to tell them to “grow up” but I didn’t.’
‘Parents should allow their children to be neutral.’
These are some of the comments from teenagers who have found themselves ‘stuck in the middle’ between two parents who are in the process of separating. Not a nice place to be!
During this time emotions are running high and it’s often difficult for parents to communicate with each other in a reasonable way. You could become the messenger between them, find yourself being asked to take sides or get caught up in crossfire. You will feel divided and it might be a struggle to remain neutral and not get caught up in issues that belong to your parents and that only they can sort out. Your parents probably don’t realise that they are putting you in an impossible position so help them to understand by explaining to them what it is like for you. Letting your parents know how you feel is really important as they will assume that everything is okay with you unless you tell them. You could decide to say nothing and tell everyone you’re ‘fine’ but eventually things will build up and you’ll end up feeling worse.
Excerpts taken from ‘When Parents Split’ by Glynis Good